Living through cockroaches and thinking about many pills

Just too weaky, too fearfull and above all the things, too imaginative. There's no such a monster. Its just the usual and disguised ones that lives among us. These ordinary bugs that we want so damn dead, and we want it because we are them too- we have been all metamorphosed into human-monsters. Samsa may say. The point is i am keeping the dead cockroaches around, as to makes me remember such as the monster inside of me as other people and mainly, its death. Because this nothing-more than a mutant-inside-insect, turns the things around the world so deadly, do cold surviving, in order to dig a hole inside and outside itself that could bury anything and everything alive. There is no more feelings turned real with these terrible starving animal. The thing is, doesn't matter in which conditions the fucking bitchin' died, it matters that its dead means my reborn. (Just fuck it all because i know there's a million of them waiting to come to me. For now, i can manage it growing with this death of the monster that is everywhere and more than all, inside of me). === Now i'm really looking at them and it isn't such a huge thing. Actually, it isn't big at all. Neven flies. But runs and moves that disgusting and scary antenna how it was some kind of power. Monsters must not make me cry again. And i won't allow anybody to cry for them. The way i am just trying to make truly efficient to take the mask, to retrometamorphose, is not to see the monster but through it. It's kissins the monster in the face.